Heard a joke about hell.. I ROTFL (RolledOnTheFloorLaughing)

13 Mar

It’s 7:32pm. Aunty Clara calls the kids to gather round her and sit. After a long day, they want to relax by sharing jokes. Since she’s the convener, she opens the floor and tells a few jokes about hell. About how the devil got a slap from a human just arriving hell.. About how there was a riot in hell and all the inmates broke free, tied all the demons in chains and started running towards heaven.. About how a Nigerian placed a phone call to the president from hell.. About how Bill Gates has a personal demon-attendant in his private quarters in hell.. About how hell will be so so fun ‘cos Biggy and Tupac will organise musical concerts.. Blahh.. (You’re familiar with those lines).
The children naturally listened with rapt attention ‘cos Aunty Clara told her jokes with such prowess. She painted vivid pictures with her words and took those children on an imaginary adventure trip.. to hell. In their imagination, they could ‘see’ the demons in their black dresses (much like cute halloween costumes). Some of the demons even styled their hair. They saw the fire as well (which didn’t mean much anyways.. and of coz, why would it be called hell if there were no fires?). They saw the computer department in hell as well. They saw and saw. Oh, they so saw. Subconsciously, to them, hell had become nothing but a fairy tale.
Just read some jokes about hell on my blackberry messenger. I had gotten it as a broadcast. They were so funny they made me laugh. But the question is, is hell really a joke?
Does the fact that people have come up with all kinds of jokes about hell (and heaven) mean both places belong in the realm of fantasy?
We’ve become more and more numb to the fact that hell exists as a REAL place where eternal fires rage. These fires burn with sulphur and brimstone. People who turn their backs on God will eventually be housed therein, forever! There ain’t gon be no jailbreaks in hell. Incoming or outgoing phonecalls won’t be placed to or from hell. On arriving at hell, no demon would hand you a nice cup of ice cream and engage you in a fancy chat about choosing what hotel room you wanna be lodged in. And the worst part is, once one manages to get into hell, it’s a different story from going to the NYSC orientation camp. It would be far far better if one served a hell sentence of a thousand or even a million years. At least a million years is still a definite length of time. Sooooooooomeday, it would end. But inprisonment in hell is forever and ever. A million times a million times a million millenia doesn’t even begin to describe it.

The realities and horrors of hell go beyond jokes. Hell matches no human description. In fact there is absolutely nothing “jokey” about it.

Considering these horrific descriptions of hell, some people feel certain “God can’t be so wicked as to put people in hell”. That’s a huge mistake.
God has made adequate provision for everyone to escape the fires of hell. It’s left to each one to accepts God’s escape route. Jesus says in John 14:6, “I am the Way, the Truth and the Life. No man comes to the Father except through me.”


Posted by on March 13, 2012 in Uncategorized


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3 responses to “Heard a joke about hell.. I ROTFL (RolledOnTheFloorLaughing)

  1. Mileskiy Olufsen

    March 13, 2012 at 10:03 am


  2. kay

    March 13, 2012 at 7:09 pm

    I’m scared shitless already… #eru!#

    • Eit Neves

      March 13, 2012 at 7:45 pm

      Thinking about the realities of hell, it’s wise to be scared.. but more wise is it to also take the right measures to walk away from it. Men decide their own destination right from this earth.


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